in love with someone gone
part of  family
 
5,534
2
96
1004
88wins97losses11left

Art by Aexif!

Haha, who thought I'd make it this far, Lemon? =)

Art by Mizzmox!

To the people who matter the most: Ballsy and arials92

Art by Shwartz99!

Introduction

Hello! I am user #419623 "Golbolco", the owner of Golbox, home of the Golburger, proprietor of the Golbultima franchise of setups, arbiter of all things Golbamania, and creator of over 100 roles (including king, usurper, snowman, cutler, librarian and rival!)

Golbolco: A Summary by Arianna:

"golb!! so at first i thought u were just some huge troll n like rlly rude actually but after a while i've gotten to spend more time w/ n around u n i've rlly grown to like u n b a fan i think u have an admirable attitude bc u are more mature n rational in situations than most ppl i've come across here n u have good thoughts n ideas n are rlly patient w/ ppl =)"

Art by Taurarius!

Frequently Asked Questions

Why do you downvote everything? I downvote net upvotes and upvote net downvotes. It's to keep the universe in balance.

Are you real? Contrary to popular belief, yes.

Art by Pavoneo!

People Golbamania has run wild upon

  • Sishen- Crime: Abusive moderating and being too sloppy to even cover it up properly; Verdict: Public shaming and demodding - UPDATE: Crime: Harassing underage girls and then trying to turn it around on SirAmelio when chatbanned for it; Verdict: Public shaming on the lobby wall
  • Jimbei- Crime: Lying and manipulating other users to become Sandbox owner; Verdict: Public shaming and forced owner transfer to Golbolco
  • Error- Crime: Toxic actions, mod abusing, harming the community; Verdict: https://epicmafia.com/topic/79558 - UPDATE: He's dead, Jim.
  • Merlot- Crime and Verdict: https://epicmafia.com/topic/80858

Art by Lukageo!

Quotes

"This year has been rife with turmoil, tragedy, and irretrievable loss. I urge you all to find help where it's available and to never hesitate to consult an admin, moderator, or better yet, a qualified professional for assistance. This is a community. We love, we hate, we bicker, we troll. This doesn't necessarily change the dynamic of our EM family. I have my heart and soul invested in you folks. All I ask is that you take the steps to look out for yourselves and your loved ones. Be well. Be safe. Happy Holidays." -Error, to the community

"You're a stupid squawking Neanderthal, probably because you are a sandbox player. ¯(ツ)/¯" -Sonseray, to Bebop

"make ur quote 'wow golbolco, your a-reel peas of shit'-Aquity" -Equity

"thought you were a female until you opened you're jaws. now I confirm you're something else, entirely. you should be silenced forever; simply erased... you're vile & repugnant with a desperate undertone of "needing to prove"; you're also 30 years of age and regress to childlike tendencies with each passing second of your insignificant existence...how long will you continue this pathetic charade? and how i pity anything else you spawn." -jay23, to Wubat

"We shouldn't have a mod that's incompatible with and has nothing but contempt for the community they're supposed to be serving." -Christopherzilla

"The ignorance of this community... I bet all of you would play epicmafia over roblox..." -tigermom

"HI IM GOLBOLCO DID YOU KNOW I HAVE TOURETTES I CAN'T STOP SAYING EPICMAFIA IS ONLY SLIGHTLY PROFITABLE." -CooperD

"And this time, I'm not gonna get caught. I've returned to EpicMafia after about... mm, I don't know... a YEAR? But this time, I will be king of EpicMafia! And I got my crew with me, and guess what? You're not gonna be able to do anything! 'Cuz I got like 50 alt accounts ready, and like... come on, troll me bro! ‘Cuz I’m all ready for this, you know? And like… - you know what? You guys won’t be able to figure me out this time, ‘cuz I got this new plan: I’m gonna be king of EpicMafia! All the times in the past I’ve failed, but NOT this time. This time I’ll succeed. The first one who ever hacked EpicMafia; that was me. The first person who ever truly cheated to the extent of making the forums a million times; that was me. And the one who’s gonna take over EpicMafia? It’s gonna be me. So I’ll see you guys in the leaderboard. Later." -AdamTheGambler, to Lucidrains

"there are no bad roles just bad players" -bdog1321

"YOU'RE A BIGGER JOKE THAN ME." -WildWalrus, to Slowbro

"I guess your IQ pales in comparison to my 150." -Moomo, to bdog1321

"When Golbamania comes… You’ll hear no banned users roar… No weebs annoying with their anime… No noavis growing in the meadows… No memes on the sandbox wall… The mods will fall where they rule… The SJWs will rot and wither… No trolls annoying in the forums and no hackers spamming games… Not even the EMJack script will warm you in your games. You shall hear only the golbamaniacs whistle… And then you will know. Golbamania has come." -SirAmelio

"kick golboco all he does is sui out when caught and not play the game" -ruiyang

"golbolco is better than me at everything" -Christopherzilla

Art by NekoMANRI!

http://sketchtoy.com/67062196

http://sketchtoy.com/67106830

Art by Herredy!

Lore

Art by ObitoSigma!

My threads

https://epicmafia.com/topic/76487 Star Wars Facts

https://epicmafia.com/topic/76403 Daily Drama Report

https://epicmafia.com/topic/76670 How to make a Golburger

https://epicmafia.com/topic/77253 Sandbox Pranks

https://epicmafia.com/topic/77350 R E L E A S E

https://epicmafia.com/topic/77607 Hoob

https://epicmafia.com/topic/78634 Golbamaniacs

Art by NekoManri!

Conclusion

I hope you have enjoyed your stroll though my profile as much as I enjoyed writing it all up. Feel free to go through my answered questions (feel free ask me anything anytime!), read through the comments or check out some of my roles. Thanks!

Friends (698)

Questions

deletedabout 7 years
remember when you used to have a "list of people who are not malarkey" and then you deleted it? I was on it. :(
I need to update my profile sometime.
over 7 years
but who IS golbolco
A thousand elephants are stomping on my feet.
over 7 years
welcome back scrub
Back in Black - AC/DC
over 7 years
i just got an Xbox one, would you reccoment GTA V or GTA 5?
yes
over 7 years
Get trolled on kiddo
You will not regret this.

Achievements

4 / 20Super Sleuth!
3 / 20I'm Miller, I Swear!
3 / 20He's Batman
3 / 20Do No Harm
1 / 30Oxyclean
almost 9 years
not true
almost 9 years
ur cool
almost 9 years
I'm crying too.
almost 9 years
wow I'm actually on the list. im crying.
almost 9 years
im giving you back the karma that i took away. your behaviour has improved. im proud of you son
deletedalmost 9 years
My first +k!
almost 9 years
Wow, GODAWFULPLAYER, thank you so much. I was in fact entering each role manually, lol.
deletedalmost 9 years
lmao my advice doesn't even work

i mean it does but it also adds all the red mafia roles. you have to turn on multiple mafias, manually deselect them all, then turn off multiple mafias to make the setup.

it's still a lot easier than clicking every role in the game by hand, but it's still way too much clicking
deletedalmost 9 years
hey golb, if you didn't already know: i have discovered a cool way to make a gobultima setup without manually clicking a whole bunch of buttons.

how do you do this? it's simple! just paste this cool code into the console of a chrome browser when you're creating a game after you've clicked "closed roles":

var items = document.getElementsByClassName('inc icon-caret-up');
for (var i = 0; i < items.length; i++) {
items[i].click();
}

you were probably already doing this, but i figured that if you WERE manually clicking every role, that would be a travesty against humanity, so i decided to say this anyway just in case.

just remember to uncheck host.

(i discovered this in my efforts to make godawfulbultima, which is your setup but also with every custom role in the game. this is still, sadly, an impossible task, but eventually i'll figure out which roles are broken and it will be a thing.)
deletedalmost 9 years
(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧ I will miss you~

<3 SnowyB
deletedalmost 9 years
#FREEGOLBOLCO

A present from booty to bae: http://vocaroo.com/i/s08T0A9vIxHG
almost 9 years
#freegolbolco
almost 9 years
#freegolbolco
deletedalmost 9 years
WHY I AM NOT IN THE LIST?
almost 9 years
It is SO big.
deletedalmost 9 years
look. at. her. butt!
almost 9 years
It's a non-issue. The more concerning thing is that Lucid was willing to do this thrice, with nobody contacted ever, and the fact that Sandbox is complaining yet again is going to mean that he might do it a fourth time.
almost 9 years
golb i feel bad for u remember that deep down in my heart i did care for u
i will still avoid your sh*tty set ups though
almost 9 years
If you say so.
almost 9 years
KEEP THIS