I wrote a poem a few years ago which has resonated in me somewhat over the past 24 hours or so. It's not really the best poem in the world, nor do I know if it's disrespectful to post it here. I can't help but feel it was applicable to someone of Eris' mindset, especially in his last remaining months, or even years. I just wanted to share it on the off chance that it may appeal to someone in a similar position. If you are unhappy in life, please find a way to make a change in your lifestyle so that you can appreciate what is around you.

Whilst she asks The Sandman to bring her a dream,
I urge this sand man to end a regime.
For the dream is there to be chased and not summoned.
Why allow oneself to wait and be bludgeoned;
In conscience and in morality?
You are your own worst enemy, a self-inflicted casualty.
They say, "good things come to those who wait"
I say, "who is this Mr. Good Things and why is he late?"
But if 'they' are correct,
And if 'they' too believe that "time waits for no man";
Then why must 'they' doubt us?
Is it because we took something beautiful and quantified it?
As we created the sundial, the watch, the glass and the clock.
Something that has ran free for an eternity 'til man;
To be contained, forever to merge with the laws of our land.
From this notion I'd now like to gain over myself the upper hand,
Before it's too late and a walking cane becomes my sole demand.
Life is not something we should sit and watch pass;
For there are only so many grains of sand in the hourglass.

I feel very reserved with stuff that is personal to me, especially when it comes to a website such as this. Eris' story is a complete tragedy, not only to himself, but to those around him. Please do not allow yourself to follow in his path.

itg. in another thread please.

I get where you're coming from and you seem to mean well but this needs to remain a positive place and not become some debate

no, the loss of someone's life is terrible and a sad event all around, but refusing to discuss the possible effects how toxic the em community is, especially the old userbase is laughable and ignoring a very real reason for depression and/or suicide.

many old users have taken it over the line and have been extremely toxic, keyboard warriors who have the guise of the internet to hide behind.

and you people wonder why everyone stays away from comp. sandbox, by and large, has a much nicer, friendly community which does not make every day high school drama and does not find reasons to start hatemongering and isolating most of its playerbase.

I wish i had actually known Josh, Because from what i've heard he was a fantastic person and a great friend. We will Miss you very much. R.I.P Josh.

Can we start some sort of fundraiser in his honor?

He was brilliant at doxxing. Maybe start a small scholarship for computer science majors or something. Or donate money to his family on behalf of us. Idk. I just want to do something.

Let's keep this respectful. Josh was dealing with a lot and while I'm sure all of the insults didn't help, blaming everyone for being toxic won't help anything

mist says

The obituary exists, but it is not and should not be posted here as that'd be OPI.

Well, I doubt that applies in this case. It was more for personal donations, etc.

Again, this should be a wake up call. The em community, especially its older userbase is vile and toxic. Many keyboard warriors forget they're dealing with people and take things way past a certain line. Honour garyoak by being less of a toxic [redacted].

Yeah, I talked to him not even a week ago - I still can't believe that he's gone. Meh.

This should be a reminder for you to treat people like humans and not like animals! Be kind to those around you, for you might not know who is going through it. Half of the world and the players of epic mafia are heartless so this message will go ignored.

Please do not post his obituary here. I don't want it to be made a mockery of.

I swear I had just talked to him about a week ago on Facebook. He even deactivated his account there :(

I just can't wrap my head around this. I can't thank him enough for saving me. He tried to help others clearly and he always made me laugh when he posted silly things via facebook. Ugh dude, I hope you're doing alright up there. I truly am sorry I couldn't save you.

Well, gonna pop in here just to say that I'm gonna be honest, I'll miss the Oakmeister.

I was in the Minecraft server, that's where I knew him the most, although we also talked on Steam and on EM of course.

He was mischievous as always, but when it came to me I'd like to believe that he liked me well enough to refrain from bothering me too much, or doxxing me and releasing that information to the public. (although he did attempt to dox me anyway)

I'm pretty sure he vouched for me as mod, although I can't be 100% on that. Could be my memory being bad.

I do know that we had many laughs on the Minecraft server, he made me a mod and I had a load of fun messing around on there. Literally the only time Minecraft was enjoyable for me. I could tell he trusted in me making me a mod, even would try to have some fun with me by sometimes randomly teleporting into me and attacking me after turning off my invincibility. Also sometimes messing with people who came in from another website, or were clearly griefing/hacking. Those were fun times, and it was definitely a time I felt some sort of kinship with him, including that time I played Diplomacy with him, which he was exceptional at. Then again, I can't forget that time when I completely destroyed him at Civ 4 with a huge army, but that's another story. I'd say we were good friends for the year or so we talked, and I think his best friend Riotkiller AKA Mikalis can attest to this. I also think he would have the best post on Josh.

Anyway, he definitely had a softer side to him that most people who didn't spend enough time with him didn't see, I guess that's what I want people to take away from this post, if nothing else. Sorry for the long post.

The obituary exists, but it is not and should not be posted here as that'd be OPI.

agentzero says

I'm assuming a link to an obituary will be posted when available?

It's been available since yesterday, but not sure if it's appropriate to post it here.

agentzero says

I'm assuming a link to an obituary will be posted when available?

The obituary is available, though I'm not sure if it's being outed since nothing was said about it and I'm sure his loved ones would appreciate privacy in their mourning.

The best thing we can do right now is pay our respects.

I'm assuming a link to an obituary will be posted when available?

Didn't know/barely knew the guy but doesn't make it any less sad. RIP.

I <3 eris

Well, this is sad for so many various reasons.

Doxing (from dox, abbreviation of documents),[1] or doxxing,[2][3] is the Internet-based practice of researching and broadcasting personally identifiable information about an individual.[3][4][5][6] The methods employed to acquire this information include searching publicly available databases and social media websites (like Facebook), hacking, and social engineering. It is closely related to cyber-vigilantism and hacktivism.

what is doxing?

Removed for personal reasons.

It's hard to even read his last words. I wonder how much harder it was to endure such suffering. I never had contact with him but Im deeply sad about this . No one deserves what he have been through. I hope his suffering can help people that are going thru the same to find help.
Shine on, Josh.

I had only heard of the bad part of GaryOak. I only heard about the myths of his doxxing, and it makes me sad that I only heard of that part and not the real GaryOak, the one who was an unbelievable person. Nobody should endure the torment he went through. Rest In Peace.

Who was Josh? I don't know many people here on a first name basis .. still R.I.P