welcome to fixin' it w/cub where we fix everything wrong with epicmafia's dying userbase

hope you don't get triggered by bullet points because here are some ways to fix it

• don't talk about how epicmafia is dying - when the big discussion on a website is about how dead it is, people start getting the wrong impression. or the right impression, depending how you define facts

• help noavis - people are going to leave the site, that's inevitable. who's going to replace them when you run off all the noavis? your alts? what a nerd just be nice to the newbies and save yourself the impending shame of being alone

• stop banning people - when you remove someone from the website, what happens to the total number of users? hint: it goes down. if you're a mod, you need exercise, and finger wagging is a good place to start. it gets your blood pumping marginally better than clicking "ban user"

• everything is a joke, get over it - seriously why do people get mad on this website you know you're being trolled just troll back it's that easy. you know when's the last time i was harassed? idk a long time ago because i just f*ck with people who try

• be more interesting - this one's a doozy: stop being boring and idling every game. you know why the game is boring? because you're boring. everyone just concedes to their self-inflicted boredom every game instead of doing something wild and wacky like ccing party host or shooting celeb. live a little you loser

follow these five steps (4 if you're a lowly normie outside the mod circlejerk) and i gaurantee your hair will start to regrow within weeks