this happened when i was 12. it was a cold wintry day. i was in a car alone and golbolco came over to my window and asked if i wanted free hot chocolate. i drank it and i passed out. when i gained consciousness i found myself chained to a couch with all of the golbamaniacs wearing robes staring at me hungrily. they then summoned jamal and he unchained me and i went free. but, it was too late, golbamania was already upon me.
once at the golbox i ordered a golburger minus the pineapple as a joke and golbolco looked at me like i was crazy. she then told me i "knew the password" and took me down to a hidden room full of pineapple pizza. she then proceeded to force me to eat the pineapple pizza against my will.
lemme tell you about golbolco, she’s my next door neighbor. sometimes at 4am you can hear her shuffling in my yard, digging with her hands in the dirt for worms
One time golbolco burned down my tree house and when i confronted her about it she mumbled something about asexuals not being real and started running circles around me. Terrifying experience, 1/5
one time golbolco vomitted in my lap, and it produced the same feelings i have towards her posts. please, if you love yourself, don't subject yourself to the same torture i hvae
