VonDoom

Score
53,755
Kudos
2
was crushed... and divorced! and crushed again!
66
Doom
PROS HERE
married todeleted

The VonDoom's FAQ:

  • Q) Yo, VonDoom! I hate you. Die in a hole.
  • A) The VonDoom would like to point out this isn't a question. Also if you hate the VonDoom you shouldn't play with it. The VonDoom is okay with this.

  • Q) Why do you talk in 3rd person?
  • A) Because the VonDoom feels that it is disrespectful to address the great and one and only VonDoom as merely "I" or "me". To do so would be a great disrespect.

  • Q) Why do you refer to yourself as an "it"?
  • A) The VonDoom can refer to itself as an it because not only is the VonDoom its name, but because the VonDoom's title is also the VonDoom. Further, the VonDoom is not even sure if it can classify itself as a person as humans understand it, so a gender pronoun wouldn't suit it.

  • Q) VonDoom you're so gay, faggot!!!
  • A) While the VonDoom is not a gay, there is nothing wrong with that. There is nothing wrong with being a faggot either. The VonDoom thinks you're a douchebag for using these words as a derogatory slur. The VonDoom repeats itself: there is nothing wrong whatsoever with being a happy bundle of sticks.

  • Q) You suck at mafia, VonDoom!!!
  • A) While the VonDoom always plays to its win condition, it mostly plays just to play it. The VonDoom finds this game played by humans to be an amusing reality experiment.

  • Q) Who's your main, anyway?
  • A) The VonDoom isn't sure. It knows it is inhabiting a mortal's body but can only express itself when that being is intoxicated. For that reason, the VonDoom could be anyone, even you.

  • Q) In that case, how can I know if I'm the VonDoom?
  • A) If you ever see a message appearing on EpicMafia.com that says "You are now VonDoom!", then you can be fairly certain you are, in fact, VonDoom. Never recalling seeing this message does NOT mean you cannot be the VonDoom, however, as this message is probably forgotten due to alcohol blackout.

  • Q) I have an opinion about you, VonDoom! You care?
  • A) The VonDoom always likes praise, which egotistical split personality wouldn't? However if you wanna criticize the VonDoom, he also cares. To be honest, the VonDoom loves to be loved and hated equally. The VonDoom understands that all hatred he receives is actually fear, after all.

  • Q) Are you artistic?
  • A) Nope, VonDoom has the art skills of a rusty spork.

  • Q) Yo, the VonDoom! I think you're racist/sexist/elitist.
  • A) No, the VonDoom is none of those things except the third one. The VonDoom simply hates everyone equally, you see, and therefore can make fun of all races and sexes. Furthermore, the VonDoom does not think you're inferior due to your race/sex/religion/etc., but rather thinks you're inferior because... well, you're not the VonDoom.

  • Q) You like the Raiders? HAHAHAHA THEY SUCK!
  • A) The VonDoom isn't a Raiders fan. The VonDoom's avatar is a parody that puts the Doom guy onto the logo of the Raiders, which is funny to the VonDoom. If you must know, the VonDoom is actually a Dolphins fan.

  • Q) So you're Doctor Doom?
  • A) The VonDoom is actually not affiliated with Dr. VonDoom, although it praises what he stands for. VonDoom is actually the VonDoom's first name. Its last name is McDoom.

  • Q) What is your full name?
  • A) VonDoom Doometrius McDoom.

evosenator, self delete or no honor: https://epicmafia.com/game/4047028/review