i puked blood last night dude my bodyll go ten thousand extra miles to get wasted and you know it

Groundhog day is the epitome of Electroshock Therapy Failure

He is the type of person who is the result of the less alien version of area 51 experiment offspring who escaped

I hope you actually get sickle cell and need some sort of electroshock therapy to blast out the genetic confusion in your body and you puke daily before you drink enough to get drunk

poser says

Literally my dog eats her own feces and sleeps with pizza crust in general how are you gonna say that trying to bang a female necjbeard dog is worth much

doesn't sound too different

Idk my dog would eat a lot of hot dogs too so I guess it makes sense why I've chosen to tolerate both of you for a long while

Are we really going there

she's been blatantly thirsty and you know it

Literally my dog eats her own feces and sleeps with pizza crust in general how are you gonna say that trying to bang a female necjbeard dog is worth much

When u say go for u imagine someone lunging and it is because my dog will run away from something she instinctually knows should be three times larger than what she will receive one day as a small dog from another dog

time to go for daisy

that posts amount of confidence is like that sad guy who ate 300 hot dogs in 10 seconds and puked or something but he was still happy

"like yeah thats enuff right???????" u have no swag or tact when u ask like that u need to deserve my mouth muscles going to work

lmao that post is like putting your cards on the table at blackjack but you brought uno cards

literally blowjob when

where am i please help im in bed with a lying snob who implies he wont drink with me if he didnt want to but i said do it

how can there only be one of me if i have so many personalities before during and after drinking u liar why do i marry liar what is happening

the thread is like "wut u drink on" but thats implying that i am drinking it rather than like....... my blood pumping is the decision that is happening more so than the fact that i am drinking, like do u think i care if my liver hurts, that's just a part of the ride

we were in missoula and at the bar while we waited for an airbnb to respond so they had specials on grey goose therefore i had to order two doubles and the guy actually looked at me like i am pathetic but i do not care

when ian took the alcohol away from me one time because i was too drunk and he went to eat breakfast with his mom(lmfao breakfast fuuuuuuck) i got mad and ordered $200 worth of alcohol and one was called kinky liquor cuz i thought it'd be really funny

maybe its some sort of religious group that makes the blood of christ keep you impervious to the other blood of christ

ian does not taste alcohol so he drinks everclear straight despite feeling it go through every centimeter of your system wanting to burn a hole in you and he just does it like what the hell im pretty sure hes in a cult

when the casino had a new bottle of disaronno two days after i was there i assume it was because i bought that many shots

i drank a mysterious cranberry drink that was 30 hours old in case it was alcohol and i am not ashamed i turned 21 and it needed to happen

at some point i drank my alcohol with antibiotics except it was directly after waking up and it was just vodka i did not finish the night before