Specks of incandescent light glittered across the immutable void of space. The nothingness encompassed the screen with the tyranny of absolutes; Christopherzilla sank into his seat, his hands clammy with the sweat and tears of childhood dreams dashed against the jagged shore of maturity. The vast empty universe lingered on the screen for seconds, an eternity, then seconds turned into more seconds and just as Chris was about to avail himself to despair, it happened! There was nothing, and then nintendo cried out, "let there be light," and the oppression of the void was instantly broken by the resplendent glow of a monolithic 4. Christopherzilla's body was wracked in the throes of pleasure, as though at the mercy of some great revelation - he was both exhausted and exhilarated, he could swear his heart stopped beating. "Metroid prime" appeared in muted letters beneath the monolithic beacon that was the 4. Christopherzilla sh4t right in his Mariokart diapers. He jumped to his feet, aware that in his periphery many others had done likewise; tears brimmed down his cheeks in rivulets, he pumped his fists into the air and tilted his head in silent supplication. He had seen the face of god and he would preach the evangel: nintendo had won E3.
