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i just think

over 7 years

We need a break from all the hidden ranking threads. I don't know what this thread is going to be but enjoy it while it lasts.

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over 7 years
:0 do i count as a bad texter?
over 7 years

Voice says

Do y'all have any relationship/significant other dealbreakers?


Definitely:

- addiction to alcohol/drugs
- consistent dishonesty
- paranoia
- excessive negativity
- people that can't hold a conversation/bad texters
over 7 years
It'd be pretty unfair to ask those questions without providing my own opinions so here are mine (sorry i would've done this as i asked them but i was watching a movie):


Voice says

Do you think I should go for a person that's very attractive and a personality I really like but they live 70 miles away or pursue someone that is less attractive in both of the other ways but lives a lot closer?




Distance doesn't scare me so I'd definitely pursue the long distance relationship, but I'd keep the 2nd one active in case I can work out a close to home FWB situation.


Voice says

On another topic: do you think it's wrong to be "talking" to more than one person of interest at a time? What're the pros and cons of this to y'all?


It depends on how far you are down the line. I think there's definitely a line that you shouldn't be trying to talk to two people romantically even before you're technically dating. When it starts to get serious I kinda tend to block anyone out but the person I'm interested in.
over 7 years
im not asking for advice im just trying to spur discussion LKFDSJAFLKDJSALFKDJSA

But I appreciate y'all's responses and opinions they're fun to read :]
deletedover 7 years
I have some experience with the long distance, my ex lived 90 miles away from me and while it was a trek both ways, I still believe it to be the most fulfilling relationship I've had. If you feel your personality clicks better with them, I'd say go for it. I'd recommend trying to close the distance because for my personal experience, we ended up breaking up over distance because I moved even further away from college.

do what makes you happy tucker :)
over 7 years

deandean says


JeffreyAaron says

i think we all agree on that. the disagreeing from both jack and me was in regards to saying that there's not a potential for a worse experience from long distance than "normal"


That's true, I probably shouldn't have said that.


deletedover 7 years

JeffreyAaron says

i think we all agree on that. the disagreeing from both jack and me was in regards to saying that there's not a potential for a worse experience from long distance than "normal"


That's true, I probably shouldn't have said that.
over 7 years
i think we all agree on that. the disagreeing from both jack and me was in regards to saying that there's not a potential for a worse experience from long distance than "normal"
deletedover 7 years
Well I mean that's the thing with relationships. It can be bad but it also cannot. But if you like the personality then it go for it. There's only one way to find the answer. That's just how I see things personally. If I enjoy the person a ton and I think there's a connection I don't think it's the worst thing in the world to give it the old college try.
over 7 years

deandean says


Voice says

@ anyone that reads this thread: Do you think I should go for a person that's very attractive and a personality I really like but they live 70 miles away or pursue someone that is less attractive in both of the other ways but lives a lot closer?


Go for it. It can't be worse than other relationships *shrug*


that is very much not true
over 7 years
also it's hard when you need someone to physically lean on at times and you can't do that and then feelings of doubt about your relationship come i.e is it worth it, should i just find someone here, are they lonely without me too or am i alone in this and they're okay, etc.
over 7 years
well i disagree 100000% percent w/ dean cuz the thing is that it CAN be worse than any other relationship. i feel like going into long distance can be so dangerous and should be something you really consider and don't take lightly. it's so mentally taxing and i feel it can set up for so much heartbreak. it's also a lot harder because you can't see the person and you have to trust them a sh'it ton more imo (because you can't rely on actual evidence of having been with them and know where they are at times)
deletedover 7 years

Voice says

@ anyone that reads this thread: Do you think I should go for a person that's very attractive and a personality I really like but they live 70 miles away or pursue someone that is less attractive in both of the other ways but lives a lot closer?


Go for it. It can't be worse than other relationships *shrug*
over 7 years
ummm as for your question, i dont think i have any off the top of my head at least that would be hard clear cut dealbreakers because i think relationships are SO complex and so is a human being in general so i have things like "if they lie to me" come to my head, but then there may be hundreds of situations where that can be justified and okay. so, in short, no.
over 7 years
i would like to say yes but i have not even had the ample opportunity to ponder that. maybe not dealbreakers per se but jealousy and being fake is not fun to see
over 7 years
i have hookup dealbreakers and i almost posted them and then i reread what you said so i dodged a bullet
over 7 years
Do y'all have any relationship/significant other dealbreakers?

(I still don't know what this thread is don't ask me)
over 7 years
oooo that's a good one. if you're not like committed to someone i don't think there's necessarily anything wrong with it, but at the same time i do think in order to have that work you need to be clear on if the other ppl would be uncomfortable with that.

so pros are you can be more efficient, have more fun (lol), idk i guess just better odds overall to find something that works right? more people the more opportunities

cons i guess it may be more difficult to connect personally one on one if you're having that simultaneously with multiple people, and the potential jealousy if one of them wasn't okay with you doing it
over 7 years
idk if you're reading my comments at all but i'm still gonna answer lol.

omg this question is a hard one because i found myself struggling with this same question. i feel like dating is so much effort and it's hard for me to get the effort to pursue multiple at once, but then if one doesnt work out i kinda fuc'ked the other by ignoring it SO i think it's good and OKAY to talk to more than one person at a time as long as you're careful in your words and not leading them along when you know you may not be able to stay true to the feelings you put out or make someone else feel. i think its good to do, just a lot of effort that i myself dont have, but wish i did. i think it's also good because when we choose to not do it, we do one at a time, and we might see that our initial first choice was bad and that what was our third choice would have been best, but we lost the chance. try it out imo
over 7 years
On another topic: do you think it's wrong to be "talking" to more than one person of interest at a time? What're the pros and cons of this to y'all?
over 7 years

jack says


JeffreyAaron says

" if you know you can close the distance, then go for it."

idk if we are having the same thought but like this made me think if you don't think there is a foreseeable time in the future where you can actually be together and close in distance for good then it's not worth it imo


sort of. i would never say it's not worth it, just that it's probably worth mulling over more


true. i disagreed with that part as i posted it. i think any chance you think you can fall in love is worth pursuing, just make sure you're guarding yourself and protecting yourself :3 idk lol im in a weird state rn cuz i feel in love but its just the immediate aftermath so my posts are all heightened to extremes lol
over 7 years

Voice says


jack says


Voice says

@ anyone that reads this thread: Do you think I should go for a person that's very attractive and a personality I really like but they live 70 miles away or pursue someone that is less attractive in both of the other ways but lives a lot closer?


the spark far outweighs the distance, but only for the short term. eventually the long distance factor will be a larger obstacle than you may have anticipated/be able to handle, depends on the situation. if you know you can close the distance, then go for it. if you don't know, well then maybe it should be further reevaluated.

the closer one, with 'less attractive' qualities than the other, are those qualities still good? like say, a 7 being less than a 9


This is less of a specific example than it is a general one. An in-depth would you rather if you will.


gotcha. well if it's a would you rather, i'd probably choose the closer one. but that's just me
over 7 years

jack says


Voice says

@ anyone that reads this thread: Do you think I should go for a person that's very attractive and a personality I really like but they live 70 miles away or pursue someone that is less attractive in both of the other ways but lives a lot closer?


the spark far outweighs the distance, but only for the short term. eventually the long distance factor will be a larger obstacle than you may have anticipated/be able to handle, depends on the situation. if you know you can close the distance, then go for it. if you don't know, well then maybe it should be further reevaluated.

the closer one, with 'less attractive' qualities than the other, are those qualities still good? like say, a 7 being less than a 9


This is less of a specific example than it is a general one. An in-depth would you rather if you will.
over 7 years

JeffreyAaron says

" if you know you can close the distance, then go for it."

idk if we are having the same thought but like this made me think if you don't think there is a foreseeable time in the future where you can actually be together and close in distance for good then it's not worth it imo


sort of. i would never say it's not worth it, just that it's probably worth mulling over more
over 7 years
" if you know you can close the distance, then go for it."

idk if we are having the same thought but like this made me think if you don't think there is a foreseeable time in the future where you can actually be together and close in distance for good then it's not worth it imo