https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrDDkKPUFa4

"Gingivitis has been eroding the gum line of this great nation long enough, and it must be stopped. For too long this country has been suffering a great moral and oral decay – in spirit and incisors. A country’s future depends on its – on its ability to bite back. We can no longer be a nation indentured. Our very salivation is at stake.

Together we must brace ourselves as we cross over to the bridgework into the 21st century. Let us bite the bullet and together make America a sea of shining smiles, from sea to shiny sea.

Now friends, some people will tell you that this mandatory tooth brushing law is about the secret dental police kicking down your door to make sure you’ve brushed. Friends. It is not.

Some will mention the dental re-education centers or the preventative dental maintenance detention facilities. It’s about none of these things. It is not about the government issued toothpaste containing an addictive yet harmless substance. No friends. It is not even about DNA gene splicing to create a race of winged monkeys to act as tooth fairies.

Friends what this mandatory tooth brushing law is really about is strong teeth for strong America.

And remember, a vote for Vermin Supreme is a vote completely thrown away."