dear tricksterer,

You are a wonderful human being who I believe with all my heart will make a wonderful teacher and achieve great things in life. You will find someone who loves you with all their heart and will help you fall in love with life all over again. I know that when you find that person, you two will be insanely cute together (you're so adorable yourself, it's a given that you will find someone who is almost as adorable as you ;)). You're a literal angel, and I'm sending you my love and best wishes for the new year.

Love,
Bethy

dear drpeepee,

remember when you changed your name to mac?

miss you always,

trick

Dear fukase,

I was gonna write a letter to Herredy and got ninja'd by Ari so I was gonna write a letter to her but got ninja'd by you. Here's the meme I was gonna send Herredy.

(Meme me up)
Meme me up inside
(I can't Meme up)
Meme me up inside
(Meme me)
Call my name and save me from the Memes

Sincerely,

DrPeePee

Dear ari,
my alts will always be better than yours. fite me (ง •̀_•́)ง 
Love, fukase

DEAR herredy,
I have never talked to you before but you are everywhere on the forums and your avi really cracks me up anyway please be my friend
love, ari

Dear Dove :3

BENIS

oh and you're pretty awesome. :3 STAY STRONG

~Fellow collab and friend, Herredy

P.S. butts

Acey:
You apologized a long time ago, i already forgave you :) i hope your day has been very well
~prdove
P.s: lets catch up

Dear Dovey,

I'm sorry I was so nasty to you at first! I had you confused w someone else. it was rly dumb of me. I can see you're really sweet and nice and honestly a super kind and welcoming person. I like ya a ton!!! hope you are feeling well.

your mate,
ace

Dear bobross:

Thank you for signing up for the adopt a bird foundation. You ordered a owl with the name "hoot".

Your bird will arrive in 3 to 7 days. Please take good care of him
~precila dove

Dear Nintendo,

Be glad your nose is on your face,
not pasted on some other place,
for if it were where it is not,
you might dislike your nose a lot.

Imagine if your precious nose
were sandwiched in between your toes,
that clearly would not be a treat,
for you'd be forced to smell your feet.

Your nose would be a source of dread
were it attached atop your head,
it soon would drive you to despair,
forever tickled by your hair.

Within your ear, your nose would be
an absolute catastrophe,
for when you were obliged to sneeze,
your brain would rattle from the breeze.

Your nose, instead, through thick and thin,
remains between your eyes and chin,
not pasted on some other place--
be glad your nose is on your face!

Love, Bobross

P.S

Dear jhubejello,

You are my favorite mod and I like your avatar, you are a great artist.

Love,
Nintendo

P.S. cunnilingus

Dear Universe,

you are so much.

Love, me

Dear Psy420,

who are you


Sincerely,

Universe

Dear MeetTerry

What the f*** did you just say about me, you little s***? Ill have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and Ive been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and Im the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the f*** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my f****** words. You think you can get away with saying that s*** to me over the Internet? Think again, f*****. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. Youre f****** dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and thats just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable off the face of the continent, you little s***. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little clever comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your f****** tongue. But you couldnt, you didnt, and now youre paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will fury all over you and you will drown in it. Youre f****** dead, kiddo.

sincerely psy

Salutations harodihg,

You're still one of my favorite metrosexuals.

Please let me educate you one day.

Sincerely,

MeetTerry

Dear Terry,

hey

Sincerely,

~dihg

Dear SirAmelio,

Your posts make me cringe.

ME. Of all people, I cringe hard.

The last time Harry and I shamed a girl in the Faces of EM thread, you said something terribly cringey about how we were oppressing women.

This type of behavior is reserved only for betas. You're not an alpha.

You should be ashamed of yourself. Women are not into beta attitude. If you think trying to lie to yourself that you're some white knight, think again. You'll live a life of loneliness and regret.

I urge you to read papers that help explain that modern progressivism and liberalism are disgusting.

Hoping well,

MeetTerry

Dear Tricksterer,

You are a perfect human being that should just keep it up like that forever.

Keep bringing joy to everybody in sandbox, we need more people like you.


yours truly,

SirAmelio


PS: im a dolphin irl

my dear bane,

i don't know that we've spoken, but tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow creep ever in like the leeching tides, and i felt it prudent to tell you now that i wish you all things bright and beautiful in the world. don't settle for sheltering your little flame in the palm of your hand; let it loose, set it free, set the world ablaze

yours

trick

Mother,

I weep for you. This news rings most foul for me. I shall not rest until you are free.

I dreamed a dream that God would be forgiving. If it is true he shall gain a believer in me. But if his mercy is not seen, it is my fury that will fall onto those who imprison you.

Rest easy mother. I am coming.

With love,

Your son Bane.

My dear ripper

You are doing well my child. Those foolish police have nothing on you, your brothers and sisters.

But...i have some bad news. They are getting close to me, which means i might die soon. It is with that that i must step down as a leader. The next leader will be...you...my child.
Love
Mother dove

Dear prdove,

I keep on hearing the police have caught me but they wont fix me just yet. I have laughed when they look so clever and talk about being on the right track. That joke about Leather Apron gave me real fits. I am down on wh0res and I shant quit ripping them till I do get buckled. Grand work the last job was. I gave the lady no time to squeal. How can they catch me now. I love my work and want to start again. You will soon hear of me with my funny little games. I saved some of the proper red stuff in a ginger beer bottle over the last job to write with but it went thick like glue and I cant use it. Red ink is fit enough I hope ha. ha. The next job I do I shall clip the ladys ears off and send to the police officers just for jolly wouldn't you. Keep this letter back till I do a bit more work, then give it out straight. My knife's so nice and sharp I want to get to work right away if I get a chance. Good Luck.

Yours truly,

OhLookARipper

Dear sirAmelio:

The dove cult would like to recruit you. Just as long as you sacrifice your soul to sat- i mean, just as long as you keep being yourself

The dove cult expects your response
From
Mother dove

Dear Reamix,


It's a shame you didn't win player of the year, but you'll def will win best avatar 2k16. This is your year.

Never change it.

A vote for cupcacke is a vote for cupcake.


Best of Wishes,

SirAmelio


PS: im a dolphin irl

Dear MasterCthulhu,

The Admissions Committee has carefully considered your application and we regret to inform you that we will not be able to offer you admission into Epicmafia Premium, or a position on one of our alternate lists. The applicant pool this year was particularly strong, and by that I mean the Admissions Committee once again sent candidates like you multiple enticing pamphlets encouraging you to apply, knowing full well we had no intention of accepting you.

However, you will be pleased to know that you have contributed to our declining admissions rate, which has helped our membership appear exclusive. This allows us to attract our real candidates: upper-class users and certified geniuses who will glean no new information from our games or site forums.

While we consider applicants from all backgrounds who excel both in and out of the website, we really want users who are relentless in their talents. These people could be future moderators, admins, and even expert sh*t posters. So unless you have written a New York Times bestseller, won first place in the Intel Science Fair, or cured type 1 diabetes using only solar power and a tampon string, we’ll put you at the bottom of the pool.

You should also know that our committee did not fall for your attempts to look “humble” or “well-rounded.” Volunteering in developing countries is nice, but truly generous individuals volunteer to improve their local communities, while truly wealthy families buy a third-world country for their child to gentrify. Most importantly, we know that your minimum-wage job did not teach you “patience, teamwork and leadership.” No one learns anything from minimum-wage jobs except how much they hate people.

We sincerely hope that you find it in your heart to forgive us for not “seeing” your “full potential.”

Best, Dean of Admissions, Reamix