Introduction
Light seeps through the door as one of your kidnappers, dressed from head to toe in black, enters your prison. He leers at you and your 19 fellow hostages as he holds up a Kalashnikov rifle.
“Move,” he grunts as he opens the door to your jail.
Frightened, you and and the others follow him down the dark hallway. The kidnapper and his accomplice shove you and your inmates into a room, darker than your previous prison.
One of the kidnappers grins wickedly points a serrated knife at you as he points towards a metal table. On top of it is a suitcase.
“Open it,” he commands in a thick Italian accent.
Hesitating, you open the suitcase. On one half of the suitcase is adorned with 19 lethal silver bullets. The other half displays a polished, six-shot revolver.
Several other inmates gasp as they see the contents of the opened suitcase.
“Ladies and gentlemen, it’s time for a game of Russian Roulette.”
HOSTAGES
- triasian
- Neptune
- sagacity
- pamda
- blazehawk
- TorontosRaptors
- harodihg
- freshman
- codeslicer
- TheIrishPope
- xSoniaNeverMindx
- NothinButTime1
- caroline
- Tenacity
- DrakeJr
- Mori
- Gerry
- ChitoseSakuraba
- voluntaryloser
- Satan
A third kidnapper enters the room with a Glock 33 tucked into his belt. In a baritone voice, the kidnapper booms, "Pick 6 of your fellow inmates to play Russian Roulette. When we come back in 10 minutes, you better have 6 people ready." He smiles. "Or we choose."
The three kidnappers exit the room, leaving you helpless and frightened. Will you be betrayed by your fellow inmates?
--
The long stretch of silence is broken by a voice. "OK, so who wants to die?” asks DrakeJr.
Ironically, it is he who is bound, gagged, and shoved towards the entrance.
-
As DrakeJr thrashes to escape his binds, the remaining prisoners argue over who to select for possible execution next.
“TheIrishPope should die! HE STOLE MY LAST THIN MINT!”
“pamda dies! HE STOLE MY SPOCK!”
“NothinButTime1 should rot in hell! HE STOLE MY GIRLFRIEND!”
“Gerry dies! HE USED MY GIRLFRIEND’S PICTURE AS TOILET PAPER!”
As the prisoners argue, one name is repeated over and over.
Poor freshman. Too bad he pissed off everybody.
-
“Guys, this isn’t fair. Let God choose our next victims with the power of luck.”
The prisoners decide to play Rock, Paper, Scissors to decide the next victim.
Unfortunately, ChitoseSakuraba didn’t pray to God that day.
-
The prisoners played Duck, Duck, Goose ten times to select the next unlucky one.
Despite days of hunger, Tenacity was couldn’t run fast enough even after losing all those calories.
-
BURP. A gagging stench radiated throughout the room.
It wasn’t surprising that harodihg’s fellow inmates sent him rolling towards the door as they agreed that they were unable to bear his stench, burps, and lack of personal hygiene any longer.
-
Thump, thump.
“Guys, they’re coming!” Neptune urgently whispered.
With a battle cry, Satan jumped up and ran to the door, almost knocking down a kidnapper as he yelled,
“I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE!”
--
"So these are the runts that you've selected?" a kidnapper chuckled. He pulled DrakeJr to his feet and booted him to the center of the room.
Meanwhile, a kidnapper silently loaded the revolver with one of the 19 bullets.
As DrakeJr was given the gun, DrakeJr pointed to his gag.
"Mmm-mmm-mmh?" he tried to say.
"Hurry up and shoot, you imbecile," the kidnapper spat. "Or we'll shoot you ourselves."
DrakeJr whimpered as he spun the cylinder once. Hesitating, he pointed the gun to his head.
BANG!
Everyone gasped. To his surprise, DrakeJr wasn't dead.
He promptly fainted.
-
harodihg was sent rolling to the center of the room and crashed into DrakeJr's unconscious body.
"MMMF!" DrakeJr screamed (or mumbled thanks to the gag). Moaning, he returned to the mass of prisoners.
harodihg shrugged as he spun the cylinder once, twice, thrice.
He pointed the gun to his forehead while making the cutest doge expression ever.
BANG!
The gun clattered to the floor as harodihg frowned. "Gosh darnit, I had practiced my doge death face," he mumbled.
-
"Someone tell me a funny knock-knock joke," freshman said as he spun the revolver's cylinder five times.
pamda sighed and said, "Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Anita."
"Anita who?"
"Anita d*** inside me!"
freshman doubled over, howling with laughter.
One kidnapper couldn't stand the incessant laughter anymore and walked over to the laughing idiot. He aimed the gun at freshman's head and pulled the trigger.
BANG!
A crazy grin was plastered on freshman's face as blood pooled around his head.
"At least he died happy." The kidnapper smiled. "Who's next?"
--
The prisoners immediately resumed their argument as soon as the door clicked shut.
The first victim settled on was DrakeJr - after all, he was prepackaged for execution, bound and gagged, since Round 1.
DrakeJr regretted not signing up for Magic Camp; he could’ve learned how to escape his binds, but alas, DrakeJr was extremely frightened of cute, fluffy bunnies.
-
TorontosRaptors cowered in fear as he was slammed against the wall by Tenacity while the rest of the prisoners cheered.
“Please don’t kill me,” TorontosRaptors pleaded. “I have a pet turtle named Bob at home, and he’s pregnant, and I need to perform a C-section on him so he can give birth to wonderful turtle babies and-“
The prisoners honestly didn’t give a f*** about pregnant male turtles that needed C-sections, so they clapped when pamda punched TorontosRaptors and knocked the poor pet owner out.
-
“Eeny, meeny, miny, moe,” codeslicer counted. “Catch a tiger by the toe, If he hollers, let him go. Eeny, meeny, miny, moe. My mother told me/says to pick the very best one, and that is Y-O-U!”
codeslicer was pointing to himself.
He sighed. “Honestly, f*** my life.”
-
Satan puffed out his chest. “I wanna volunteer again!”
“Why do you want to die so much?” voluntaryloser murmured as Satan skipped to the locked door and tripped over DrakeJr.
-
The kidnappers barged in, barely glancing at the pile of unlucky victims - DrakeJr, TorontosRaptors, codeslicer, and very excited Satan.
“You only have four prisoners,” a kidnapper said, then chuckled. “Guess it’s time for a raffle!”
His eyes settled on two prisoners trying to hide from the his sight.
The kidnapper pointed to the cowards. “Get them.”
Gerry and NothinButTime1 should’ve learned to become men.
