Long ago, when there were still Kings of Ireland, there was but one requirement that you might be one. You had to have nipples.

This was because sucking another man's nipples was taken as to show your loyalty to him. Some artsy bit derived from the mother breastfeeding her child no doubt, and probably latently homosexual. But primarily, just pure awesomeness.

If you were beaten in your challenging the then King, you would have your nipples cut off as to never again allow you a chance at challenging a King.

And hence, us Irish are awesome. Rings are for pus5ies.

anyway who wants to meet up and go drinking at a local pub?