one time i was arrested and i have been arrested so many times i've finally just figured it out, just be polite and you'll get out early, probably get away without a court case. but i'm pretty drunk this time and i'm laying it on thick, being over polite, thanking the cops for opening the backdoor of the cop car for me, for taking off the handcuffs etc. and then later they're like 'have u ever been in trouble before?' and i'm like 'hmm, ya, nothing major tho' all angel faced lol
next thing there's this cop like behind a door frame on a computer, i can see his back and the back of his head, y'know? so i'm after saying all this and next thing he rolls backwards on his office chair and looks at me like 'wtf u have assault on a police officer on ur record'
and all the cops' heads snap to me, and i look around at them, and then i just laugh the fck out loud
