Sorta goodbye thread?198
So, I've been kinda dodging this for a while - it's been in the cards for months, now, but I've continued to stay here regardless, because, as I'm sure everybody here knows, I love drama. I really do. It's fun. But it's also consuming and takes away resources from much less questionable pursuits.
The fact of the matter is that sandbox is exhausting. I'm glad that we're at where we are now, compared to sandbox (and EM as a whole) when it was filled with 4channers and the like, but frankly, half the userbase acts like teenagers on tumblr who've just found out that they're capable of forming opinions. And that's exhausting.
It's exhausting being hounded obsessively by people who hate you. It's exhausting arguing with bigots who spontaneously decide they care about social justice whenever they engage with you. It's exhausting arguing with people who expect earnest responses to their bad faith strawmen. It's exhausting having to avoid games with users who harass you, but everybody else is fine with. It's exhausting having straight up bigotry thrown at you, and the people so concerned with your supposed problematic behavior giving it a pass, or even worse, DEFENDING it. It's frankly just exhausting, period, and honestly, this rant in and of itself is overly self-indulgent.
That's not to say there aren't users here that I like - in fact, there's quite a lot of you, and I appreciate you all dearly. Despite the constant drama and "discourse" here (again, a euphemism), there've been people who stuck by me, and that's something I value. Hopefully, y'all can salvage this hellsite and turn it into something meaningful.
Anyway, I don't really know what I'm doing yet , but I intend to scale back the time I spend on EM and dedicate it towards more meaningful, or at least, less irritating endeavors. I might come back to play minigames and such from time to time, and I'll still be active in Crackbox (https://discord.gg/WkmYJ4H if you want to keep up with me there). But either way, I'm hoping to disengage from all... this.
I probably should have done this a while ago, honestly. The fact of the matter is, when you stay in toxic environments long enough, you find yourself becoming toxic in response, like it or not. Sometimes, the situation is just unsalvageable, and all you can do - for yourself, and for others, is walk away. So that's what I intend to do.
unless something happened offsite
The whole reason I used to like being here was that this is one of the only communities I have been a part of that was supposed to be better than that. Despite all of it's flaws people held each other accountable for this kind of stuff. I don't know if people are just becoming more and more disconnected from being in isolation but the respect anyone has for each other around here has plummeted. It's gross that bappho wasn't more harshly punished for the things she said. It's gross that people continue their own abhorrent behaviour and celebrate and defend it going unchecked by the community. It's gross that this site has developed such a culture of victim blaming and shaming against anyone who doesn't tolerate it.
There is plenty of actual bullying that goes on in this community. Calling people out for their bigoted behaviour is not bullying, it's holding each other to a higher standard.
throwback to how bebop never apologized for being a factor in why tifennie left the site by abusing his mod privileges to help bully her and the others involved and ppl still praise him.
at least the current sandbox userbase isn't as bad as it was b4 and alyssa's ownership has led to a more decent community.