Sorta goodbye thread?198
So, I've been kinda dodging this for a while - it's been in the cards for months, now, but I've continued to stay here regardless, because, as I'm sure everybody here knows, I love drama. I really do. It's fun. But it's also consuming and takes away resources from much less questionable pursuits.
The fact of the matter is that sandbox is exhausting. I'm glad that we're at where we are now, compared to sandbox (and EM as a whole) when it was filled with 4channers and the like, but frankly, half the userbase acts like teenagers on tumblr who've just found out that they're capable of forming opinions. And that's exhausting.
It's exhausting being hounded obsessively by people who hate you. It's exhausting arguing with bigots who spontaneously decide they care about social justice whenever they engage with you. It's exhausting arguing with people who expect earnest responses to their bad faith strawmen. It's exhausting having to avoid games with users who harass you, but everybody else is fine with. It's exhausting having straight up bigotry thrown at you, and the people so concerned with your supposed problematic behavior giving it a pass, or even worse, DEFENDING it. It's frankly just exhausting, period, and honestly, this rant in and of itself is overly self-indulgent.
That's not to say there aren't users here that I like - in fact, there's quite a lot of you, and I appreciate you all dearly. Despite the constant drama and "discourse" here (again, a euphemism), there've been people who stuck by me, and that's something I value. Hopefully, y'all can salvage this hellsite and turn it into something meaningful.
Anyway, I don't really know what I'm doing yet , but I intend to scale back the time I spend on EM and dedicate it towards more meaningful, or at least, less irritating endeavors. I might come back to play minigames and such from time to time, and I'll still be active in Crackbox (https://discord.gg/WkmYJ4H if you want to keep up with me there). But either way, I'm hoping to disengage from all... this.
I probably should have done this a while ago, honestly. The fact of the matter is, when you stay in toxic environments long enough, you find yourself becoming toxic in response, like it or not. Sometimes, the situation is just unsalvageable, and all you can do - for yourself, and for others, is walk away. So that's what I intend to do.
I didn't know a lot of this stuff about d1pshit and reading through the thread it's pretty clear that no one, myself included, should've ever given her the time of day. She was extremely deserving of a lot of the criticism she received. Still, stuff like transphobia is never acceptable, the action isn't justified by the target.
I understand that Nimau was making sort of veiled accusations and when you read stuff like that it's natural to wonder if you yourself are being accused of something. But I think just based on how specific Nimau was in the behaviors she was describing she's talking about certain individuals, and if you don't know who she's talking about it's like, probably not you? Like, if you were someone who called out d1pshit that doesn't automatically mean Nimau was talking about you, I'm pretty sure... if you never made a transphobic comment then you shouldn't feel accused. It was a "you know who you are" sort of thing.
I really didn't want to post this in the thread because there's so much history and context here that I'm missing and the last thing I want to do is get my dumb clueless a$$ involved but it's just upsetting me because I'm reading people arguing and it feels like people are taking turns espousing the same fundamental views but are somehow also accusing each other of not holding these views. Like either there is some major subtext I'm missing or everyone is just arguing about something they agree on, which is that hateful and bigoted comments are never okay, no matter what.
This is honestly a non-issue when it comes to her racist and sexual remarks and the fact that this is becoming such a big part of the thread detracts from everything being said on the racism front
At no point did I excuse or defend her behaviour. I didn't make a single comment about anything racist she has said or done and in fact openly condemned her behaviour but it's cooler to use buzzwords and act like you're morally superior instead of accepting that some of your friends might be shittу people.
Why do abusers, bullies, transphobes, and the like deserve respect? Outside of you not liking ONE of the people some of them have chosen to target why are you so adamant about defending this behaviour?
i hope you eventually realize what a clown you've become
idk if u remember but when i was a mod i used to talk a lot abt the in-fighting with the mod teams and how hard it was to get community related vios bc so many mods would rather look the other way than deal with issues. that has never stopped being a problem and its probably even worse now given who our admins are
for instance when i modded i specifically was the community mod who handled most community related reports and also generally handled the forums and community relations. now no one is doing that